Weaning from Breastfeeding: A Guide for All Ages

Whether you are weaning an infant or a toddler, the decision to end your breastfeeding relationship can be difficult. There are some things to take into consideration. How to wean with as little pain or discomfort as possible. What will make the transition go as smoothly as possible for the both of you. I’m hoping this guide will break it all down and answer any questions you have about the weaning process.

Weaning Before Age One:

Breast milk or formula should be the primary source of nutrition until 12 months so if you decide to stop nursing, make sure to replace those feeds with formula.  Don’t just rely on food.  Keep in mind, you may have to experiment with a few different types of formula to figure out which one works best for your baby.  Ask your pediatrician if they have any samples so that you can try a few types out before committing to buying one.

Keep in mind that breastmilk and formula taste different. Ease your baby into transitioning to formula if possible. Start by mixing bottles with half breastmilk, half formula and slowly increase the amount of formula added every few days.

If your baby has never taken a bottle before, you may need to try a few before finding one that baby likes.  The three that worked best for my kids are Comotomo, MAM, and Dr. Brown’s.  If your baby doesn’t take a bottle, consider offering formula in an open spout cup or a straw cup.

Weaning After Age One:

After age one, breast milk no longer acts the primary source of nutrition for your child, table food does.  That being said, you don’t need to wean your child just because they are one. The nutritional content in breastmilk is still the same and it will continue benefiting your little one.  There’s also an emotional connection between mama and baby with breastfeeding, and if you aren’t ready to give up that specific connection, don’t feel like you need to. 

If you are ready to be done nursing, there’s no need to transition to formula.  You can give your toddler cow’s milk or whatever alternative works best for your family.  

Have a dialogue prepared for helping your toddler to understand that you are done nursing.  When your little one reaches for your shirt or tries to initiate nursing you might say something like “no more milkie, milkie is all gone”.  Be prepared with a distraction during your normal nursing time.  If you normally nurse first thing when your little gets up in the rocker in their room, have a cup of milk ready to offer them while you snuggle on the couch together.  Move away from your 

Tips for Weaning

• Go slowly if possible.  Drop one feed every one to two weeks to help your body adjust to the new milk requirements and minimize discomfort.
• You can also shorten feeds before completely cutting them out.  Cut the feed time in half.  For example, instead of nursing for five minutes each side, only nurse for two.
• Avoid areas of the house that are associated with nursing if you are trying to avoid nursing.  If you usually sit in the nursery and nurse when your little wakes up, consider going straight to the kitchen for a bottle of formula or a cup of milk instead.  
• If possible, have your partner/family member/nanny soothe your little during times when you normally nurse.  In order to drop our morning feed, my husband would wake up with our sons and get them a cup of milk.  Having him get our kids up in the morning helped break the association of nursing upon waking and made it smoother for both me and both of our boys.

Night Weaning

Sleeping through the night is a developmental milestone, just like crawling and walking.  It’s important to realize that not every baby is going to start sleeping through the night at the same age. I know it can feel discouraging and frustrating when you hear your mom friends talking about how their babies have been sleeping through the night since three months old and your eight month old still isn’t (been there, done that, twice) but I promise you’re not alone.  Your child will eventually begin to sleep through the night, which means you eventually will be able to get an uninterrupted night’s sleep too.

That being said, just because your little is waking up at night, it doesn’t mean you have to nurse them every time.  Here are some tips for gentle night weaning:

• Give your partner a chance to soothe the baby.  Sometimes your little just wants some comfort, and that doesn’t necessarily have to be in the form of nursing.  Cuddles, a soothing song, or maybe a sip of water depending on their age may be all that’s needed.
• Increase day time feedings.  Make sure your little one is getting enough breastmilk during the daytime at each feeding.  As babies get older they begin to get more distracted when nursing during the day. This means they may not be taking in as much milk as they need.  Try and nurse in a quiet dim location with few distractions. This will allow your little to focus strictly on nursing to make sure that they are filling up on milk.
• If you are nursing a toddler and want to night wean, try reducing access to your milk.  Wear a tighter fitting high neck shirt to bed. Your toddler won’t have such easy access to your milk and this may be enough for them to decide it’s too much work to nurse in the night.  Depending on your littles age and comprehension, you can explain that they only nurse when the sun is out.  Try using this clock as a sign for when nursing is ok.  If your toddler wakes up thirsty in the night make sure that there is water easily accessible to them.

Managing Pain and Discomfort

• Peppermint tea can help dry up your supply quicker, which will help minimize problems with engorgement.  Try drinking a few cups a day if your goal is to dry up your supply.  I love the brand Traditional Medicinals, and you can find it at most grocery stores. 
• Cold cabbage leaves can be very comforting.  This study has shown that applying cold cabbage leaves is as soothing as applying a hot compress.  This treatment is great if you are experiencing discomfort or engorgement, or especially if you are dealing with mastitis.  All you have to do is clean some cabbage leaves, pop them in the freezer until they are chilled, and then apply directly over your breast.
• Hand express or pump as needed to relieve discomfort.  You don’t want to express or pump to the point where you are completely draining your breasts, because that’s telling your body that it needs to make more milk.  Express just enough milk to relieve some of the pain or fullness that you are experiencing.  You may have to continue doing this for a few days or even longer, depending on how much discomfort you are experiencing.
• Sunflower lecithin can be a game changer  if you suspect a clogged duct or mastitis.  Sunflower lecithin is a fat emulsifier that can help thin out your milk and make it less “sticky” which in turn helps your body express it easier.  Talk to your health care provider about trying this supplement and what the recommended dosage would be for you. 

Things to Look Out For

• Clogged ducts
  • Clogged ducts can occur when the breast isn’t properly drained of milk, causing a blockage occurs.  If this happens, the area can become red, inflamed, tender, and itchy. You may also feel a hard lump under the breast tissue.  Increase your nursing or pumping sessions on the breast with a clogged duct to help remove the clog.  Other tips for dealing with a clogged duct include utilizing heat. You can hand express in a warm shower or apply a warm compress to your breast. Massaging the tender area can be uncomfortable but helpful. Try dangle feeding (lay your little on the ground and nurse hovering over him on all fours).  Holding your baby in such a way while nursing that the baby’s nose lines up with the clog can also help as this position has been shown to be helpful for draining the duct easier.  If the duct doesn’t get unclogged, it can develop into mastitis. This can be much more painful and may require more intense treatment.
• Mastitis
  • Mastitis is inflammation of the breast tissue and it can develop into an infection if it’s left untreated.  Symptoms include breast pain, swelling, warmth, and redness and you may experience flu like symptoms including body aches, chills, and a fever.  It’s not uncommon for women to experience this during lactation and weaning and unfortunately it can be extremely uncomfortable.  Weaning slowly should prevent mastitis, although it doesn’t always.  If you suspect you have mastitis, call your health care provider to determine the appropriate treatment.
• Mood changes
  • It’s not uncommon to experience a range of emotions while weaning including sadness, depression, anxiety, irritability, and mood swings.  The sadness might be due to realizing that your little one is growing up and his or her needs are beginning to change or it might be due to the hormonal shift your body undergoes with weaning.  There is a shift in oxytocin (the feel good hormone) and estrogen with weaning.  The slower you are able to wean your little one, the less drastic the hormonal shift will be on your body, making the hormonal changes less likely to have a severe impact on your mental health.  While mood changes associated with weaning tend to be short term, if you are experiencing any symptoms of sadness, depression, anxiety, irritability, or mood swings don’t hesitate to reach out to your health care provider.  There are plenty of ways to support your body and your mental health during this transition both via nutrition and medication if needed.