I actually wrote Theo’s birth story a few weeks after he was born because I didn’t want to forget what the experience was like. I’m so excited to share it with you because I absolutely love hearing about other women’s births. My goal was to have a natural un-medicated delivery at the birth center my husband and I chose. Keep reading to hear about my loooong labor and eventual hospital transfer. I will say if you are a family member, or are squeamish, you may want to skip this post all together because there are some details shared.
How it All Began
When I was 38 weeks I just had a feeling Theo would be coming soon. I didn’t have any early signs of labor, but I sensed that he would be here sooner than my due date. One night when I was 38 weeks and 2 days I decided I should probably pack my labor bag. I had a checklist of things I would need written up so I got my stuff together. By the time I was finished packing it was already 11:00p. I remember telling myself that I needed to start going to bed earlier. A lot of times labor starts in the middle of the night and I wanted to make sure if that happened I would be as well-rested as possible.
Well, joke was on me. I woke up two hours later at 1:00a Thursday morning, October 27th, and got up to pee. This is when I realized that my water had broken in a slow trickle. I hopped in the shower to relax myself and then got back into bed to try and get some sleep. Contractions began shortly after, but they were very intermittent and mild. I was a typical first time mum and was too excited to fall back asleep. Finally around 3 Jordan woke up and I told him my water had broken. I called the midwife to let her know what was going on but we agreed that I should continue laboring at home as I was still in the early stages of labor. Of course Jordan fell right back to sleep so I rolled around in bed for a few more hours trying and failing to relax.
Finally around 6:30a Jordan and I got up for the day. We ate breakfast together and chatted and then he decided to go in to work for a few hours. My contractions still hadn’t really picked up in intensity and they weren’t getting closer together so I felt comfortable laboring by myself. I did some cleaning and when Jord got home I insisted he vacuum the house in preparation for the baby. At 3:30p we went in to the birth center so that they could check me. Up until this point my contractions felt like really mild period cramps and still ranged from 10 to 15 minutes apart. When we got to the birth center I was told that my water had only partially broken and I was dilated to a 1. I was definitely slightly discouraged by that because I had been in labor all day at this point. At the same time my contractions were so mild that I wasn’t really that surprised. The midwife went ahead and broke my water fully and we were sent home to labor some more.
My last bump picture taken the day I went into labor
Things Get Real
When we got home I went to sleep because I knew I was in it for the long haul and wanted to catch up on some sleep from the night before. I woke up around 6p feeling so incredibly nauseous. The contractions had intensified and I felt absolutely horrendous so I told Jordan we should head back to the birth center. While Jord went and got the car ready I was in the bathroom throwing up.
We made the thirty minute drive back to the birth center and got there around 7p. My midwife checked me and she generously told me I was dilated to a 2. I felt like someone was playing a damn joke on me at this point and wanted to cry a little bit. I don’t even remember the contractions being that painful, but I was just so nauseous. She called in the nurse and I got an IV and Zofran because we were concerned about me getting dehydrated from throwing up. I spent the night sleeping in between contractions, and at one point even fell asleep draped across the birth ball. When I was checked early in the morning I was 7 cm dilated. At this point I decided to get into the bath, where I labored for a while.
The contractions never felt intolerable to me and while they weren’t comfortable, I was able to get through them. It wasn’t like on tv where the woman is screaming and cursing. I moaned pretty loudly at certain points, did not want to speak when they got particularly intense, and absolutely did not want anyone touching me. Jordan said I got pretty snappy and would yell “don’t touch” if he tried to comfort me or massage my back or anything haha. I also remember getting so hot during contractions and then freezing right after. When a contraction hit I would moan “hot” and Jord would frantically start fanning me with a handheld fan. Then when the contraction passed I would say “cold” and he’d have to quickly wrap me up in my fuzzy bathrobe. Haha I made sure he did his part as well.
It’s Go Time
Around 11:30a I was fully dilated and experienced the transition period before I was ready to start pushing. Transition can be different for everyone but for me it was the most intense part of labor. I seriously don’t really remember the contractions, but I definitely remember transition. My entire body started shaking so badly I was convulsing. At the time Jordan was so calm and comforting but he told me later he was kind of freaked out over the way I couldn’t stop shaking. It was so uncomfortable and I can’t even really describe how bad I shook haha other than to say my body was literally convulsing off of the bed uncontrollably. Finally the transitional phase passed and I was ready to start pushing.
I Pushed and I Pushed and I Pushed….
I pushed on the birth stool, standing up, in the shower, laying down, in the bath. I pushed, and I pushed, and I pushed for four hours. My midwife and Jordan kept cheering me on and commenting on how they could see his head, but then after the contraction passed and I stopped to breathe he would ascend again. He was stuck behind my pubic bone and couldn’t seem to get past it no matter how hard I tried. It was so hard to remain positive at this point because I was absolutely exhausted and felt like I had nothing left in me and I was really discouraged with the lack of progress. I also found it difficult to continue trying different positions. I was so tired, all I really wanted to do was lay down.
Throughout all of this Theo’s heart rate stayed strong and he was never in distress, but at 3:30 we decided to transfer to the hospital. I didn’t feel like I could push any longer and my midwife informed me that they would likely need to use the suction to get him out. This is the first time in the process that I kind of freaked out. I was born at 35 weeks via suction and my mum always told me it was horribly painful (she didn’t have an epidural) so I was kind of terrified of having this happen.
We Transferred to the Hospital
The minute I got in the car to make the mile drive to the hospital I felt a shift and could tell that Theo was coming really soon. I felt so much pressure and had the strongest urges to push. When we got to the hospital they came down with a wheelchair and took me up to labor and delivery. They checked me and when they saw that he was coming any minute they quickly got me to a room. I’m pretty sure once I got to the room I closed my eyes and didn’t open them again until Theo was born.
I remembering vividly how overwhelmed I felt at the hospital. I felt like there were so many people were in the room and the lights were so bright and there was just so much commotion in general. My midwives at the birth center were so calm and relaxed and encouraging. At the hospital the energy was frantic and everyone just started screaming at me to push, push, push. I felt like I couldn’t even breathe, but thankfully my doula got there just in time. She helped calm me down so that I could refocus on my breathing and pushing.
If you’ve never heard of the “ring of fire”, otherwise known as crowning, it is when you push the baby’s head out. I can’t even sugar coat this for you, the ring of fire doesn’t even begin to describe that sensation. I truly don’t remember the pain of contractions and the exhaustion that I felt during the forty hours that I was in labor, but that ring of fire is forever engrained in my mind. I’m not saying this to freak you out if you are getting ready to have a baby unmedicated. I just want to be honest. I’m pretty sure I went full exorcist at this point in time, making all kinds of inhuman noises, and I thought I was going to die.
In my mind this went on for 45 minutes. Jordan says it was actually like thirty seconds. He did say he had to step away for a second to catch his breath because it was hard to see me go through that. However, I got through it and you can too. But it definitely sucked and I would pay money to not experience that part of delivery haha.
And Then There Were Three
At 4:31p on Friday afternoon, Jordan caught our little boy and placed him on my chest for the first time. I’ve never been so in love in my life and I would do it all over again just to meet my little angel. Our sweet Theo Britton Murray was finally here, at 7lb 2 oz, and 19 ¼ in. Jordan got to cut the cord when it stopped pulsing and I held him on my chest for immediate skin to skin. I couldn’t believe he was finally here and I was instantly flooded with relief and joy and euphoria. 
I ended up losing a lot of blood after delivering the placenta. The doctor and nurses struggled to figure out where it was all coming from and finally realized I had a cervical laceration, which is extremely unusual. Since I hadn’t had any pain relief up until this point they offered me morphine before they stitched up tear (I definitely accepted… stitching my cervix sounded extremely uncomfortable). I had a minor tear on my perineum as well that they also stitched up.
We stayed in the hospital for two days because Theo had jaundice from being stuck in the birth canal for so long (his cone head was like something out of an alien movie). Sunday evening we got to bring our sweet boy home and really begin our life as a family of three.
